Ape To Man To Ape Again

27 Mar

Do you ever talk before you think? I was recently chatting with someone on a popular dating site. Halfway through the conversation I begin mentioning my restaurant and food likes/dislikes. But it didn’t stop with I like Chinese and Mexican food. No! I had to take it one step too far and go into a long story about eating too much shrimp at Red Lobster when I was 15. Ha!

I ended the conversation with a comment about my local movie theater. It hit me just as soon as I hit send that my topic choice could look much like the lead-up to asking for a date. This was in no way my intention. It just happens to be I was hungry and bored at the moment.

Look at It from this perspective, ladies. You open up an email listing a line of classy restaurants and the most popular thing people do after dining. You immediately think that the guy you met yesterday is taking a big liberty in planning a date he hasn’t even asked for. Am I right?

To add to the fact that men do not listen, I have a habit of clicking on someone’s profile without having read about their personality or hobbies and then I start immediately with what is going through my mind. Do you see the pattern? Maybe a little bit of narcissism that has gone undiagnosed until today.

I finally caught myself about to unload in some unsuspecting girl by way of email. I realized I never read one thing on her profile and went back to do so. I am glad I did because she had a surprising amount of things in common with me. So I started over with these topics in mind and not another run-away-train of the lack of good television shows, what my neighbor did in his yard, or any obscure story that proves I have no game, no common sense, and no idea of how to simply say hello and not scare off any chance of finding the right one in this lifetime.

I have no clue how to illustrate this post. But if the bottom of the page is consumed with fast-food menus, DVR schedules, or Letterman jokes, please instantly stop what you are doing, send me a message, and remind me to take yet another step forward in the evolution of man, not a giant leap back.

Ape

Copyright © Dustin Poteet

 

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