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Just Right! Goldilocks: Who’s She?

23 Mar

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Hello, Goldilocks!.”

There are 2 situations I have found just right. But did I try other choices? Only in my mind have I tried anything different, knowing full well that I would find nothing better. But sometimes the mind wonders.

The first situation was when I found Jesus Christ. Fire did not need to first try water and wine to know the real fire-starter was gasoline. Sure, the sky and the ground were close companions of lightning. But it only found equality with thunder. My heart burned with pain, but, as soon as I felt the living waters of GOD’s love through HIS Son Jesus I knew there was no better solution. In fact, no other solution. The was no reason to try any other way.image

The next ‘just right’ was falling in love with a dark-haired beauty named Christina. I love her dearly. I think about her every day. Besides a deep burning passion that comes second only to Jesus, the closeness in names to both loves makes it near impossible not to think of her. When I first met her, only a few days into knowing one another, I wrote Christina a letter confessing my true feelings. While my words were respectful to a girl who had not known me long, there is no doubt she was just as interested due to the clarity and frankness of the message. She gave me her phone number. Sadly I lost the piece of paper the digits were on and we had already parted ways. To this day I have only thought about other girls. Okay, maybe flirted a little too. Ha! But my love has always been hers as opposed to any other girl. It has been 11 years. She was 4 years older than me making her 35. We met at Hugeley Hospital in the Burleson, Texas area. Most likely she has moved on and eventually so will I, but never my heart.

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When it comes to love there is no reason to try different options. Because deep in your heart you know there is no one better. That is to separate true love from lust, or infatuation. I am talking about the kind of love that never dies. I talk to Jesus everyday confessing my love, even over Christina. Then, on many occasions I ask if He doesn’t mind sparing a small amount of my time that He would help me find my other true love.

Copyright (C) Dustin Poteet 2015

(To the best of my knowledge, all scripture is copyright free)

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Looking Off The Edge of Heaven: And Jumping! The Story of how I went to Heaven and was sent back for a time.

22 Mar

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Whoa!.”

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I stood on the edge looking down on much of the universe. The parts I can remember are missing some very glorious and magnificent details. If I remembered too much my life would be a living Hell. I am talking about my stay in Heaven. It may have been 20 years or 200, but definitely a long residency. I will come back to this. To really understand I must start at my Earthly beginning.

I was about 7 years old. It was bedtime so I got into bed. I shared a large bed with my brother, being we were both young and space was limited in our home. I closed my eyes, but I also squinted them this time. A couple of hours instantly sped forward. So I tried to work those same eyelid muscles in an opposite way to move time backwards. It did not work. So I squinted my eyes to speed forward in time. In a single moment it was morning time. I was astounded. I had the ability to time-travel. But I shrugged it off. I ate, got dressed, and lived out the day of school including homework, chores, and following my older and bigger brother around.

That night I did not even attempt anything similar to the night before. I didn’t even give it any thought. In fact two or three nights went by. On the fourth night I was reminded when I accidentally or subconsciously flexed my eye muscles. This time I traveled backwards In time. But since I started somewhere about 1 A.M. I went back to the start of my rest roughly 10 or 15 minutes into stretching out and relaxing, my brother already dreaming.

The next night I went farther and faster forward, and each following night, further and further back fine tuning the skills of how quick and how far in either direction I cared to go. To my recollection I went as far back as a few years but only stayed for 3 or 4 minutes just to marvel. Sadly this ability faded. And what was worse was the reaction I got from a brother who thought I was just being imaginative when I asked if he noticed my absence. His response assured me there was no reason to tell my parents. If I remember right, he told them in a joking manor but I quickly denied it and played into their belief I was imagining something off a movie or book. Also spending any more time explaining was not worth the cold eggs I would be eating so I ate and got ready for the day.

I revisited this ability once or twice throughout the next couple of years but with no real seriousness as to have great tales of adventure. In fact it was not till I was a preteen that I had any experience beyond the normal realm of math, science, fistfights, and being shy towards girls. Life was pretty average. I wrapped up every year of Elementary School; My summer activities included football camp, mowing lawns for spending money, Nintendo and Sega video games and working up the nerve to call my first crush on the phone.

My brother and I moved in with our mom in the next town over. Switching schools had created its own list of social and emotional problems. Add that to the pressure of beginning middle-school and going from a small town school to a bigger city school and I was struggling and very unhappy. My mother worked hard and we had limited finances but that had always been the norm. Though losing any allowance or any other way of earning spending money was rough.

I had this dream one night in a bedroom to which I was just getting adjusted. I slept in my own bed now as me and my brother were quite grown up now. But we still shared the same room. I dreamt of the inside of a building. It was a place I had never been, I was positive. But only after what happened did I have any reason to think anything of a simple dream. The next day I had a moment of childish hope and looked up the number of a private school in the phone book. It was my best effort to deal with not being accepted in my current situation. It was very unlikely due to my mom seeking decent work, struggling to pay the rent, and worrying every night about how to feed us. But miracles happen. I don’t know how I managed it. Obviously GOD had bigger plans for my life and pitched a little help my way.

My my mother was the type to play into our childhood fantasies and pacify us by participating in our ideas. More than likely she knew the costs of a private school were impossible to pay. But, to give me some momentary joy she called the number I provided. Crazy enough, the school was private, yet small(like I grew up in) and not as expensive as most(though still a little much). So we set up a time to visit.

I was excited but still kept reality in the back of my mind especially hearing those dream killing words that every kid learns means no:

‘We’ll go look at it and then We’ll See!’, she had the nerve to say!

We will see, maybe, could be, or any combination of those coming out of the mouth of an adult always mean no. So naturally what I heard in my ears was:

‘NO! I am sorry son. I love you enough to give you some false hope. But being the loving caring provider I       am and wanting to instill in you the ability to dream and the American right to work towards those dreams we are going to keep this act (this charade) going for awhile.’

We showed up at the scheduled time. The building was modest from the outside. But when I walked through the front door, it was like being hit by a ton of bricks. It was the place, THE PLACE, I had dreamed about. From the way there was two floors, to how many rooms, right down to the 2 staircases. It was the same walls, the same look inside each room. The ceiling and the floors were an exact match to what I saw in my dream. Okay, in my dream everything was black and white.

To make a long story short, I got to attend this school. Attempting to tell my mother the shocking coincidence yet again went without success. Her mind was on bills, and GOD love her for giving me such an opportunity. How much love GOD had for me to make the impossible happen and so did she.

Living in this new town and dealing with major life changes like hormones, salvation and baptism, learning from a school curriculum that was 1 1/2 years more advanced than public school, and increasing poverty or my sensitivity to poverty was a feat in itself. The next few years got more interesting than just the start of a teenager’s journey. Even time-travel was nothing in compare. I went places, saw things, and did things that most people get to just choose one from. But these adventures were beyond time and experience.

I was a fighter-pilot, a soldier, a lover, a fighter, a family man, and yes I went to Heaven! All of this I did in the span between age 12 and 14. Like living lives within this life, if you will.

I could flood the next hundred chapters with details of heroism, Air-Force Academy, marriage, kids, every job in the book, saving lives, leading church services, running for offices, and so much more. But I will get directly to the topic that has my mind and my stomach in knots at times to this very day.

I went to Heaven. I saw Jesus. I experienced the joy of finally reaching the pinnacle of Christian existence. I was seeing with my very eyes the promises of the Holy Bible. It was bliss. Pure joy. Happiness. Everything you could imagine and more. I can’t tell you everything because I can’t remember everything. To remember would certainly be Hell. In fact, I do not completely believe in my mind. Also, a way of protecting my fragile balance. Imagine going from years, decades, centuries of living in perfect paradise and being sent back to a sinful realm of hate, let-downs, failure, pain and misery, and constant waiting to see this perfect world again. If I tell myself it never happened, it would be the worse lie one could tell. To admit it is real means I am not in a place I want to be so badly.

However, the reason I am here is fuzzy concerning the details. But one picture is clear.

I was soaking up the warm rays of Heaven. Rays of GOD’s love. No need for sunlight.

Suddenly, I stood right at the gates. I looked off the edge towards and saw the universe. It is a beautiful sight when referring to GOD’s great skill. But still, it was nothing in comparison to Heaven. Yet, I was awed. I had this feeling I was going to have to come back. Jesus spoke to me in a manner like a brother wanting to carry me home but also realizing the reality of the duty that lies ahead. He said:

‘You must go back. Your job is not yet done. I can not answer your questions about how long you will have to go back, what your exact purpose will be, or even how many more lifetimes you will have to live till you return. But be sure of this my loved one, you will be coming back and it will be for forever. I understand what you are going through. I have been to Earth myself. There is not a bitter trial you have faced yet that I did not taste on the cross. You have done well, my good servant. I have one more job for you…I can tell you this: you must tell everyone you meet that Heaven does exist. Do not worry about telling them about me. Those who receive this truth will know from whom it came. But tell it! Tell everything you can. Granted when you get back, you will have no recollection of many of these details. I would not leave you in that kind of burden. GO!!’

I hesitated, which may be a fault, just long enough to take one last look at my Lord and Saviour till i return.

‘I will accomplish it. I am sorry for the hesitation. I just wanted to say you can trust me and I love You!’, I told Him.

He responded, ‘I know. Don’t fret. (As he placed His hand on my shoulder) I love you too!’

I returned to my childhood house, a fourteen year old, and continue to live out my life to this day. I am 31 years old. I have done many more things. I have seen many more places. I have a lot of questions just like I am sure you do. But one thing I figured out, and I am sure Jesus knew it too; Obviously, I will tell everyone Heaven exists and is the place GOD’s love for all of us comes from. But, whether or not it is disobeying an order there is one thing I must do while I am here (Jesus knew my heart well enough to know i would and it was probably His way of being modest and not me disobeying). I must tell people how great and wonderful Jesus is. He took our sins unto Himself so we could be presented to GOD as a perfect gift. He Himself is in GOD and GOD in Him. Accept His love and let’s all go there…This time for all eternity! Take a leap of faith. Remember, Jesus jumped! He was living in Heaven and came to Earth and will again to come for us.

Face-Down, Face-Up: Just Face It

29 Mar

Some one once said they found success the hard way. Some call this pulling yourself up by your bootstraps. But the way my life goes, I expect If I looked down my boots would be missing. And if that wasn’t enough I would  probably hang myself with the strings. Of course I would never take my life. But, I mean my worst enemy in life is usually me.

Like Jim Carey in ‘Liar-Liar I could attempt to kick my own butt, that is essentially what I am doing now. But this didn’t help him, and never helps me. The truth inevitably saves us all. But the truth is hard to swallow.

It is easier to tell ourselves everything is going to work out than except the fact life never turns out right. But even this is a lie. the truth is everything is going to be great but not into we dig in and get dirty. Like your mom used to do GOD will throw all of the stained clothes in the wash. I fear that one or two socks will go missing when the dry-cycle is over. That is essentially what these trying times are, they are a method of drying us out. Anyone who has ever taken to alcohol knows the importance of drying out. We would also never reach for the Living waters JESUS spoke of at the well.

Among other areas, I am supposed to be part Irish, part Cherokee Indian. I am also Black Dutch, oddly enough I do not believe in ‘going Dutch’ by splitting the check on a date. Just as odd is how I seemed to have inherited all of the Irish blood. I am pale. I have a fighting-temper, and I always end up face down in the mud. Though, I never drink.

I have the bad habit of trying to do things my own way, always falling down. No how many times this happens each day starts with me climbing up preparing to leap and completely expecting to fly this time. I never do. I get burned every time; at least I inherited some of the Cherokee. My face should be red with shame, but I have become numb to ridicule.

I feel just like this guy I saw on Shark Tank. He claimed that he could make gold out of ocean water by building some type of hurricane-inducing machine. Just like the doodled drawing he presented, I rarely prepare my presentation as I should.  It is an insane idea but I would not be surprised if It one day worked, his idea not mine. The man who built the atomic bomb was surely subjected to laughter not his own. This explosive invention was not the best thing for mankind and a gold machine would be the same. We are already bent on fleshly riches, me being the leader of the pack.

I am not a greedy person, but when I think about just finding love and leaving the riches, the hard truth arises once again. I am afraid in this day and age no one would want to love someone completely broke, bearing no financial or social security. No one wants a man on social-security, right? Maybe the truth is I am afraid to love someone just for who they are and that the attempt to fight the dry-out has left my personality shallow.

Either way I will be sure to jump back into the fire tomorrow. I apologize how I tend to spill my life story every time I write, right?

Copyright  © Dustin Poteet

Ape To Man To Ape Again

27 Mar

Do you ever talk before you think? I was recently chatting with someone on a popular dating site. Halfway through the conversation I begin mentioning my restaurant and food likes/dislikes. But it didn’t stop with I like Chinese and Mexican food. No! I had to take it one step too far and go into a long story about eating too much shrimp at Red Lobster when I was 15. Ha!

I ended the conversation with a comment about my local movie theater. It hit me just as soon as I hit send that my topic choice could look much like the lead-up to asking for a date. This was in no way my intention. It just happens to be I was hungry and bored at the moment.

Look at It from this perspective, ladies. You open up an email listing a line of classy restaurants and the most popular thing people do after dining. You immediately think that the guy you met yesterday is taking a big liberty in planning a date he hasn’t even asked for. Am I right?

To add to the fact that men do not listen, I have a habit of clicking on someone’s profile without having read about their personality or hobbies and then I start immediately with what is going through my mind. Do you see the pattern? Maybe a little bit of narcissism that has gone undiagnosed until today.

I finally caught myself about to unload in some unsuspecting girl by way of email. I realized I never read one thing on her profile and went back to do so. I am glad I did because she had a surprising amount of things in common with me. So I started over with these topics in mind and not another run-away-train of the lack of good television shows, what my neighbor did in his yard, or any obscure story that proves I have no game, no common sense, and no idea of how to simply say hello and not scare off any chance of finding the right one in this lifetime.

I have no clue how to illustrate this post. But if the bottom of the page is consumed with fast-food menus, DVR schedules, or Letterman jokes, please instantly stop what you are doing, send me a message, and remind me to take yet another step forward in the evolution of man, not a giant leap back.

Ape

Copyright © Dustin Poteet

 

Lost Love! Can It Be Found?

11 Feb

I have a question. What do you do when you find that perfect person, a perfectly mutual thing, and then you lose the phone number and that person forever?

I will explain!

I met this girl about 10 years ago. She was about 4 years older than me. Her name was Christina. I can not remember spelling of the name.

I was instantly attracted to her, but not in a love at first sight. But at second sight I was done for. I met her at a hospital and after being hooked I wrote her a deep, meaningful letter. I am positive she was interested because the seriousness of the letter. After reading it she would not have had anything to do with me if she was not in agreement. Yes, It was really soon. But, I knew I had to act quick before I was discharged and never saw her again.

Anyway, when she gave me her number I put it with my writing pad and Bible. When discharged I left all three. I went back but all they had was my Bible, no pad and no phone number. I was shocked but I took  it like a man and moved on. Actually it wasn’t that hard. I was doing so good from my illness that I was just thankful for living healthy.

Well, 10 years has passed. there is not a single day that goes by that I don’t think about her. Maybe it wasn’t meant to be. But, if I move on I will never lose the love and any woman who I marry will never have my heart. Obviously this would be wrong and unfair.

Not to mention Christina probably thinks I blew her off. Heck, maybe she really wasn’t that interested and completely moved. If I did find her, how does that conversation start? Hello, I am the guy who knew you for 72 hours and here I am. If somebody pulled that on me I would probably ask what facility they just got released from.

I will out it this way. If I ever come in her presence and have to stay anonymous and pull a ‘Person of Interest’ saving the day, If she is about to get shot I would jump in front of the bullet without her ever knowing the story. I mean I am not about to twist someone’s life around. the wound could not hurt anymore than the one that got away.

How do I possibly pick a cheesy photo to illustrate this story. I will just leave this part blank.

The rough part is if I ever find her, I will have to swallow the last 10 years of emotions, pretend we are just acquaintances and mange to say like nothing has developed inside ‘Hello, my name is Dustin. I think we have met before.’ Ha! Because the truth would be too much to drop on somebody.